


Big Sister, Part 2

by life_of_r3n



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Poetry, poem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:02:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26915578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/life_of_r3n/pseuds/life_of_r3n





	Big Sister, Part 2

I'm beginning to wonder how much you knew all along  
"Lauren, my whole life  
I felt as if the world was happening to me  
Now I think I'm happening to it"  
I hope to get there someday

But let's write a happy poem, why not:  
I wanted you to find my body   
But I was worried the bathroom would flood  
Remember when the pipe broke?  
We couldn't cook for a month  
Microwave dinners in the bedroom  
I didn't want you to have to do that again  
But I'd let you find my body   
(This is not a happy poem)

I guess I always knew that you had it  
Whatever "it" may be  
You were so, so small, and I saw it  
I think you're the most good person I've met  
And for a long time I thought it would destroy you

Maybe we're two sides of the same coin  
Two halves of something that is whole  
I'm a scrappy junkyard dog  
Chewing my own tail off  
I'd do great in a warzone  
I'm shit at things which aren't survival  
You sit calmly in your bedroom  
And carve a syprus into wood  
You aren't always looking for a throat to chew out  
So you couldn't if you had to  
But you do great when you don't 

I thought you didn't feel things  
But you've felt them all the time  
All those nights with a mouthful of sheets to muffle the cries  
I bet you heard each one  
I bet you knew all along

Sometimes I feel as if I've half destroyed you  
Sometimes I think you couldn't do it without me  
Whatever "it" may be

You know how to love  
Without desperation  
So here's a poem you'll never read:

I've always been a desperate thing  
You thrive with almost no help at all  
Should anyone come for you  
Just call your scrappy junkyard dog


End file.
